Glockneeb, of the U.S. Strangers, is worried.
When his last letter from Fanny ends abruptly in mid-sentence, Glockneeb realizes that he must find her, especially after his calls to her are not answered. His sweetheart, Fanny Tushbottom, may be missing, and he must locate her as soon as he returns to civilian life.
Directly after his release from the military, he visits Fanny’s apartment. Once in her apartment, he finds a bar napkin with a mysterious and puzzling message inside one of her shoes.
Thinking that he may not be able to find her on his own, Glockneeb reluctantly enlists the help of his long-time friend, Moose, who runs (though not very successfully) his own private investigation agency.
In a story that is humorous and fast-paced, and full of innuendoes and double entendres, Glockneeb, Moose, and ultimately the F.B.I., use the few clues they have to see if they can track down the love of Glockneeb’s life.
Of course, making progress is sometimes difficult as the two bumbling main characters play off each other. With his Anti-Social Syndrome (A.S.S.), Glockneeb has delusions of grandeur and feelings of superiority; in addition, he is ultra-intelligent but whiny. His friend Moose is the opposite, with his clumsy, outgoing, strong personality, he is likely to take action, even before thinking things through.
As their adventures take them near and far, we are left to wonder if there is any way they can ever find Fanny.